


purple sky (lavender eyes)

by quilfish_swan



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff, Gen, Hugs, Hyuuga Neji Lives, Post-War, These awkward kids are so cute, difficult conversations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-22
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:28:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26039473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quilfish_swan/pseuds/quilfish_swan
Summary: AU where Hinata died in her fight with Pain and was brought back with Rinne Rebirth, instead of being healed by Sakura. After the war, Naruto and Hinata finally,finallytalk about it.
Relationships: Hyuuga Hinata & Uzumaki Naruto, Hyuuga Hinata/Uzumaki Naruto
Comments: 6
Kudos: 81





	purple sky (lavender eyes)

**Author's Note:**

> Took some liberties. Everything is almost exactly the same, except 1) after Hinata’s fight with Pain, instead of getting healed by Sakura, she dies and is brought back with Rinne Rebirth, 2) Neji is alive, 3) Sasuke is on house arrest instead of in prison, and 4) Sakura never fake-confesses to Naruto :D
> 
> First attempt at NaruHina! <3
> 
> EDIT: I wasn't fully satisfied with this upon re-reads so I've been adding to it and changing things. [This beautiful fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23504569) made me realize I didn't focus nearly enough on how truly unlovable Naruto felt during the time when Hinata first started loving him, and how much that would mean to him. I'll probably continue to add things as I get a better feel for them :)

He sees it every time he looks at her. 

He sees her, with blue fists and a will that rivaled his own (a will that she’d learned _from_ him, he reminds himself, still amazed), facing Pain, alone. 

Every time he looks at her, he hears it: the sickening slam of her body hitting the ground with too much force and from far too high a height. She didn't survive it. It would have been impossible, even without the chakra rod through her heart as Pain's final insurance. She'd died. She had died for him. Hyūga Hinata had died for him.

Every time Naruto looks at her, he is haunted by the precise moment that something inside of him snapped.

(He’s haunted by the thought that if his Uzumaki sibling-student had not been so moved by his words that day, things would be much different now, and it makes him sick.)

Every time he looks at her he hears the words that she'd said to him. She probably thinks he's forgotten, since it's been months, and he still hasn't confronted her because he _just doesn't know how to bring it up_ , but he hasn't forgotten. He could never forget.

How could the first time that the words _I love you_ had ever been directed at him not be imprinted on him forever? How could the fact that he’d heard those words from Hinata’s lips even before he’d heard them from his own mother ever be erased from his mind?

_"I love you, Naruto."_

For as long as he lives, he'll never forget.

He reasons _love_ could mean any number of things, from the way a friend loves another friend to the way one loves a village, but he's not a fool. He knows that's not what she meant, knows it's deeper. The idea that someone could even feel that way for him—for _him!_ —causes something tight inside to press on his chest, at the same time as something light swirls in his stomach.

The idea that someone _loved_ him at a time when he felt like the most unlovable creature to be born makes his throat feel thick with emotion. He's ashamed that he didn't know before, ashamed that he couldn't see. He wonders what it will mean for the future. (Does she even still feel that way? Does he dare ask himself if he returns those feelings? Not yet, he thinks, not yet.)

He thinks about it all so often that when he does run into her on occasion, he finds himself stumbling over his words, with a little voice in his head (Sakura’s voice, maybe?) constantly telling him that _they need to talk._ He knows the voice is right, but he has no idea how to go about it.

It's almost sundown now, and he hasn't eaten dinner, so he heads for Ichiraku on his way home from the Hokage Tower. (He's been job shadowing Kakashi in the afternoons, and so far, it’s been extremely boring.) 

That's when he sees her, on the same side of the street, walking towards him with her head down, in a pastel pink shirt and the purple jacket she’s started to wear now that summer is ending.

_You need to talk. You need to talk. She died for you. You need to talk._

His heart stutters, and in a moment of courage, he decides, finally, that he’s had enough of the voice in his mind. He calls out to her. She looks up and waves, walks over to him.

"Hinata," he blurts (too loudly, and he winces). "Hi, Hinata."

"Hello, Naruto." She gives him a friendly smile.

He doesn't know how to ease into what he wants to say, _needs_ to say, so he just—starts.

"I'm glad I ran into you. I—I need to talk to you."

He wonders if he imagines the pinkness in her cheeks. "Right now? What is it, Naruto?"

"Ahh." He scratches the back of his head. "Do you want to get some ramen with me, maybe? And we can talk? I mean—are you doing anything right now? Sorry." _Doing great so far_ , says the voice. _Shut up, Sakura,_ he thinks automatically, though he knows it makes no sense.

“Oh,” Hinata says, sounding more bewildered than anything else. “No, I would love to. I was just going to see Neji at the hospital. But I can go later tonight. I'd love to come with you. Is everything okay?”

"Oh, yeah, everything is fine,” he says (lies). “Are you sure you can come?" He teeters. "We can talk another time." (Those are the words he says, anyway; the voice in his mind screams that _he cannot do this another time, it has to be now_ but he shoves it down. He could wait. He could wait.)

"Of course," Hinata assures him. "I can visit him later tonight."

Naruto is relieved, and he forces a wiggly grin to his face as they head for Ichiraku. Luckily, they hadn’t been far away from the ramen shop when they’d run into each other—Naruto is so stressed about the conversation he knows is coming that he doesn’t talk the whole way there.

The smell of ramen makes his mouth water.

They sit next to each other, and while Hinata’s head is down looking for something in her purse, Ayame gives Naruto a knowing look from the other side of the counter that he doesn’t know what to do with. His ears grow hot, and he glares at her, mouthing for her to cut it out. Hinata, having found her chapstick, applies a thin layer to her lips, completely oblivious. 

Teuchi emerges from the back and saves Naruto from having to ward off more silent teasing from his daughter.

“Naruto!” he roars. “Haven’t seen you since the day before yesterday! Everything alright?”

Had he really not come by yesterday? He’s made a habit of eating at Ichiraku at least once a day, whether by himself or with friends, since he’s had to hold off taking missions while his new arm gets stronger. But it seems he’d unintentionally broken his streak. 

He thinks back over the events of the previous day. He had skipped breakfast, because he’d been late for his doctor’s appointment. He’d eaten lunch with Sasuke, at Sasuke's apartment, of course, since his friend has been on house arrest since the end of the war. Then after his job shadowing with Kakashi, his sensei had treated him to dinner for the two of them at a fancy barbecue restaurant. (Apparently his new Hokage paycheck is too big for him to know what to do with, and he’s been taking all of his friends out to nice meals when he can spare the time.)

“Ah, yeah,” Naruto says, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’ve just been a bit busy, I guess!” 

Teuchi laughs. “Understandable. What’ll it be?”

“The usual, please!”

“Large miso ramen with pork broth and extra meat, coming right up!”

“What would you like, Hinata?” Naruto asks.

“I’ll have the same thing, but small. And a normal amount of meat,” she adds with a grin. Teuchi gives her a thumbs-up.

Naruto frowns slightly at the word _small_. In his recent hyper-awareness of her, he’s learned that Hinata is no lightweight when it comes to ramen, but he says nothing. That is, he says nothing until she finishes her bowl and sets it aside, as if to say she’s done eating.

“Huh?” Naruto screws his face up in a question. “No refills? Aren’t you hungry?”

He knows Hinata regularly eats at least four bowls, sometimes more, so seeing her stop after just one makes him think she might be sick or something.

She stammers for a bit. “I actually—already ate dinner,” she confesses finally. “Before I came here.”

“Oh, crap—Hinata—” The realization that she’d been too polite to refuse his awkward invitation has him covering his face in his hands. “I feel so bad. You shoulda told me, we could have done something else. Like—” (He racks his brain for another activity, _anything_ else besides eating ramen, but there’s nothing. Only ramen. He curses at himself.)

She giggles softly at his distress, and it sounds like a song. 

“I can eat quite a lot, though, you know,” she says in a slightly teasing tone that takes Naruto off-guard. “So I don’t mind.”

“Yeah,” Naruto says, dumbly. He does know that. “Yeah, okay.”

She smiles, and Naruto returns it with his own, relaxing a bit. 

He’s so hungry that he downs nine bowls, and then counts out enough coins in his froggy pouch for ten, including Hinata’s in his calculations. (He’d been paid well after the war, but without new missions, his savings are running out. Soon he might have to start _helping_ Kakashi with his paperwork instead of just watching him do it for some extra cash.) He pushes the money over the counter to Ayame. 

“Naruto,” Hinata says urgently, digging through her purse. “You don’t have to pay for me.”

“Oh! No,” Naruto insists. “It was just one bowl. And… I want to.” _It’s the least I can do_ , goes unsaid, and with that thought he suddenly panics, remembering the reason they’d come in the first place. 

“Ack!” He smacks his forehead. “I forgot that we came here to talk! I really need to talk to you. Hold on.”

He finishes paying, says goodbye to Teuchi and Ayame, and they step through the curtain onto the street. The sun has set, and the village is bathed in a soft lavender. (He can’t help but notice the way it enhances the color of Hinata’s eyes.)

“Hinata,” he says, “I know you need to go visit Neji, but would it be okay if we still—I’m sorry, I’m such an idiot—”

“Naruto.” She puts a gentle hand on his arm. “Relax. I’m not in a hurry.”

“Okay.” He takes a breath. “Okay.”

They decide to go to the lake, where crickets and frogs welcome them and the reflection of a crescent moon high in the sky shimmers on the water. As they sit in the grass and stare out at the horizon, Naruto’s heart rate climbs. He’s grateful when Hinata speaks.

“So.” She fiddles with the hem of her shirt. “What did you want to talk to me about, Naruto?” 

“Yeah,” he starts, slowly. “Yes. I’ve been wanting to talk to you about something for a while, now.” 

She waits patiently. He fumbles around in his thoughts before spitting it out.

“You—died.”

Hinata’s expression changes slightly. There’s a flash in her eyes, and she bites her lip. The words hang awkwardly in the air, and she looks away.

“Yes,” she says quietly. “I did.”

“Hinata, I don’t even know what to—” His throat feels tight, and it makes the words sound raspier than usual. “I—I think about it every single day. I need you to know how grateful I am. I can’t explain to you what I felt when I saw you fighting all by yourself—when you said those things to me—” He’s thinking too fast, talking too fast, and he stops to collect himself. “I couldn’t have done it without you. You were what… pushed me. It was you.”

There are more thoughts in his head that need to come out, but he can’t form the words. How can he explain how much it means to him that she not only _noticed_ him, but that she admired him enough to emulate him? That she loved him ( _Love. Love, love, love,_ he repeats in his mind), enough to _die_ for him?

Hinata sits quietly, with her arms wrapped around her knees. Naruto wants her to say something, anything. 

“Did you mean all those things you said to me?” he asks. _Did you mean that you loved me?_

Hinata doesn’t hesitate for a moment. 

“Every word,” she whispers. She meets his eyes and holds his gaze, as if sealing a promise that what she's said is true.

“Hinata…”

There’s a burning in his chest, and he wants… he doesn’t know what he wants. He wants to reach out to her. He wants to make sure that she _knows_ how much that means to him.

He doesn’t know what else to do but pull her into a hug, so that’s exactly what he does. 

She gives a surprised “oh” before hugging him back, wrapping her arms around him and pressing her face into his shoulder.

 _Do you still love me?_ He wants desperately to ask, but he doesn't. He pushes it down, deciding he's not ready for the answer, not ready to respond. (Not yet, he thinks, not yet.)

“Thank you,” he says instead, and hopes the incredibly inadequate words will convey the depths of his gratitude. "I'm so sorry." There are tears in his eyes now, and he doesn’t bother to blink them back. “I never meant for you to get hurt… let alone… you know. I just…” He sniffles, and he’s vaguely embarrassed that he’s crying all over her hair. “You mean a lot to me, Hinata.”

"It was my choice," she whispers. "And I don't regret a thing. I would do it again in a heartbeat."

The statement only brings more tears, and he grips her tightly. _Please, never do it again._

He doesn't want to let go. Her hair smells nice, and her touch is comforting. They're already close, but the thought that he wishes he could be even closer comes into his mind, and it scares him, so he pulls away. She doesn't seem to notice anything strange. 

Now that they're apart, he can see that Hinata is smearing tears from her cheeks, too.

"I don’t want what I said that day to change anything," she says. "I don’t want you to feel like you have to—I don't know…"

He is careful not to interrupt her. When she trails off and pauses long enough that Naruto is sure she won't continue, he speaks.

"Hinata… it changes everything. But that’s not bad,” he says. “I just never knew. If you wanted to be my friend so bad you shoulda just said so!" He grins at her. "We could have been best friends this whole time!"

She gives a soft huff, and wipes under her eyes.

"I would have liked that," she says.

"It's not too late."

Their eyes meet again.

“Hinata… I want to get to know you,” he says. “I want to be your friend. I mean—we already are friends, of course, but…” He scratches his head. “You know what I mean.”

“I do.” She smiles.

He nods, and they fall into a comfortable silence. It’s several minutes of them looking out at the shimmering purple water before he speaks again.

“If you don’t want to talk about it," he says carefully, “you _totally_ don’t have to, but I’ve been wondering for a while…” 

She turns to him. “Yes?”

“What was it like to… die?"

He doesn’t know how he expected her to respond to the question, but he’s surprised to see her eyes light up.

“I saw my mom,” she says.

“No way!”

“Yeah.” She smiles. “She was the only person there. Everything was bright, and sort of… pink. But yellow, too.” She laughs, clearly embarrassed. “I’m sure that sounds weird. I don’t know how to explain it.”

“That’s not weird at all.” Naruto gives her an encouraging look. “I bet it was nice.”

She nods. “I cried, of course,” she says. “I told her how much I missed her. It was… so good to see her again. It had been so long that I’d forgotten what her voice sounded like.” Her eyes are glassy, and it looks to Naruto like she’s trying with all her might to return to that moment. “She told me she was proud of me. That she loved me.”

She sighs, as if recalling the memory is both wonderful and agonizing. 

“It wasn’t enough time,” she says. “But I’m glad I was able to have it.”

Naruto suspects he understands that better than most. Even though he lost his parents before he knew them, what Hinata is describing sounds remarkably similar to what it was like to meet his own mother and father.

“I just realized,” Naruto says. “You were probably talking to your mom at the same time that I was talking to my dad!”

“Oh—what?” Hinata’s eyes widen. “What do you mean? You saw your dad?”

He nods, thinking back. Meeting his father… it hadn’t been what he’d expected at all, but how he wished he could go back. How he wished he could see him again, see his _mother_ again, see both of them, standing together. (He’s never seen them together; it makes him ache, but he shoves that away for now.) 

“Yeah,” he says proudly and grins. “After you… after you died, my Kyūbi seal broke. A part of my dad’s chakra was fused into it, and he helped me fix it."

“Wow,” Hinata breathes. “What was it like? To meet your dad, I mean?”

Naruto laughs. “I punched him in the gut.” 

Hinata giggles. “Oh, my.”

“Yeah.” Naruto exhales loudly, thinking back on their meeting fondly. “I was pretty angry at him after I learned the truth about… how I became a jinchūriki. But I was also so happy to finally meet him, too, so… I was a mess, y’know? I couldn’t believe my dad was the Fourth Hokage. I couldn’t believe it.” He chuckles. “I’m glad the Edo Tensei jutsu gave me another chance to say goodbye.”

Hinata turns to look out at the lake. “Not enough time,” she says, and Naruto hums in agreement. 

After a few moments, he says, “I really like talking to you, Hinata.”

She bows her head to conceal a blush. 

“I like talking to you, too, Naruto.”

He breathes in deeply and savors the lightness in his chest he feels on the exhale. This whole thing had been much easier than he thought, and now he can’t remember why he waited so long. He doesn’t really want it to end. He could probably spend hours with Hinata, he thinks with a smile, just sitting, talking between nice periods of quiet. But, remembering how she'd been heading to the hospital over an hour ago, he forces himself to wrap things up.

"Well, I guess Neji’s waiting for you, huh?" he says.

He claps his legs and rises, offering a hand to Hinata. She takes it and stands, looking like she wants to say something.

He scrunches up his face. “You thinkin’ about something?”

She hesitates before saying, “Well, I just—you can come with me. If you want.”

He doesn’t know why, but the offer makes something in his stomach flip.

“I’m sure Neji would love to see you. And you don’t have to worry about intruding,” she adds softly, before he can protest. “I see him every day.” She smiles.

It _has_ been over a week since he’s gone to see his friend, with how busy he’s been. It makes him feel a bit guilty. He’s grateful for the offer, both because it’s an excuse to visit Neji and an excuse not to part ways just yet.

“Yeah, okay!” he says. “It’s been so long since I’ve seen him, he probably thinks I forgot about him!” (But in reality, he could never forget about Hyūga Neji, because he, like Hinata, had very nearly given his life for him, and Naruto still doesn’t know how to deal with it.)

Something in his face must have given his thoughts away, because Hinata reaches out to give his hand a quick squeeze. “He knows you haven’t forgotten him.”

Naruto's lips thin into a grateful smile. 

At the hospital, Neji is in good enough shape to sit up and speak, which is considerably better than even a week ago. The three of them talk until late into the night, and when they can tell that Neji is feeling tired, Naruto walks Hinata home.

Lying in bed that night, he thinks that he wants to see her again soon.

**Author's Note:**

> These awkward kids are so cute and fun to write. I love them.
> 
> The bit about Sakura being Naruto’s nagging voice in his head was inspired by [this](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23372488) adorable ShikaTema fic where Ino is Shikamaru’s internal voice ahaha.
> 
> Thank you for reading!! :)


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